流好多血 好驚 (二)

好得人驚。我估我頭先係穿水!即係人哋大肚嗰啲,穿咗羊水咁樣嘅反應啊。我仲好慎重咁樣check一check , 唔單只之前攝起到條M巾,仲有我嘅底褲,打底褲同埋出面條leggings已經濕晒。係濕到透晒果一隻。果一刻我充分咁體驗到大肚婆所講嗰種穿水嘅感覺。

但係,嗰陣時我係喺商場喔!果一下我即刻換咗條新嘅M巾,好彩我着咗一件好長嘅衫,而且件衫係深色嘅,咁我個pat pat有幾濕,都冇咁覺。果陣我冇諗過返屋企,可能因為我仲未食晚飯啦,覺得無論如何點都要食完晚飯,先即刻返屋企解決而家嘅事。

返到餐廳,我就同老公講我穿咗水啊!佢都好似知道發生咩事咁,大家都好有默契要盡快完成眼前呢餐飯。坦白講,嗰一刻我個肚舒服左好多。之前痛到拿住拿住,痛到標晒汗,原來就係為咗呢一刻。個肚入面嘅壓力細左好多,坐落嚟嗰陣時我都覺得比較舒服。但係坐咗一陣又想起身,企起身果下就feel到有好多野,而且係好暖粒粒嘅嘢由下面出黎。

果一刻我開始覺得有啲驚,因為我真係唔知道嗰啲嘢係乜嘢。於是又即刻走入去商場嘅廁所check一下,一路行就覺得一路有嘢就出嚟,我個心真係好忐忑不安。入到去即刻睇下,原來有好多血塊出左嚟。

其實果一刻我大概都知道發生咩事,坐喺個馬桶上面就不斷咁樣排血。我見到有好多血塊沖咗出嚟,我不斷抺,又不斷有血塊出嚟,成個馬桶都係鮮紅色嘅血同埋染咗血嘅廁紙。我心諗:「唔係呀化,唔通我嘅小產經驗就係要起商場嘅廁所裏面到過?組織就要喺商場嘅廁所裏面沖走啦!」但係我都唔諗得咁多啦,因為呢啲野都唔輪到我控制啦!

隔咗一陣,我又要返去餐廳度。點知間餐廳啲嘢勁難食,叫個定食,竟然飯都可以係生嘅!食食吓又有一台後生仔係度BBQ ,搞到成間餐廳烏煙瘴氣。我成個人出晒汗,果一刻我都分唔清楚究竟係我嘅生理出現問題定係因為個環境太熱。

我好快趣咁食完自己個定食,就帶埋牙仔離開餐廳,起商場入面等老公。我仲行去對面嘅麵包舖買個麵包俾老公食,但係唔得啦,我覺得下面真係來勢洶洶,我好驚啊。正當我係餐廳門口,有啲徬徨咁係度搵老公,老公老公已經企左係度,我哋一齊趕返去啦。

起呢個時候,我有諗過好唔好坐的士返屋企。不過一諗到唔知去邊度接的士,而且我未必可以坐得低,就打消呢個念頭。我哋即刻走入去地鐵站,想錯最快嗰班地鐵返屋企。

我真係好驚啊,因為我一路行,下面就一路有野走出嚟,我完全控制唔到,我心裏面慌到痺。我知我成程車都係那好那面,唔係因為痛,而係因為慌張,我真係覺得好無奈,好無助,我完全唔知道點做!淨係知道要盡快返屋企,返到去先算啦!

可能我成日問老公,點解啲女人望住我嘅?可能佢以為我驚人哋睇到我pat pat會有野,所以佢都不斷安慰我話無事,睇唔到。仲企係我後邊,如果真係有事嘅話,都幫手遮下。但係,其實我都唔係真係太介意人點睇,果一下個心就係好慌亂,完全唔想係條街度,淨係想返屋企。因為下面不斷有嘢走出嚟嘅嗰種感覺,好令我難受。因為我心裏面幾清楚知道發生緊乜嘢事。我完全唔想喺街到經歷呢樣野。

返到屋企即刻換褲,哇!好很驚!因為真係好很多血!仲多血過我生牙仔嘅時候!我覺得好desperate ,因為就係咁喺坐車途中,我嘅孩子就咁就走左啦。

雖然我知道其實佢一早就走左,但係當佢「作動」嘅時候,身體要排出呢舊組織嘅時候,我真係唔捨得。更遑論整個過程都係喺餐廳廁所同埋地鐵車廂裏面發生呢!所以我心裏面感到非常無奈,非常無助!

我坐咗係馬桶上面,一直有好多血塊排出來,我相信裏面會有埋啲組織。但係我唔係好識得分辨,而且都唔想去分辨,因為我真係覺得好難受,我唔想用咁樣嘅方式來同佢Say Goodbye。

之後沖埋個涼就即刻上床瞓覺。下面痾血痾到咁,就梗係要出動孕婦衛生巾啦!好在生阿B嘅時候,仲有存貨,而家可以攞出黎用啦。

 成晚我同老公都好不安,但係我估佢不安多啲。因為佢唔清楚我嘅身體狀態,淨係見到我個樣痛到拿住拿住,又乜都做唔到,我諗佢個腦都實晒。
成晚我就感覺到傳聞中順產孕婦要生產時候嘅感覺,就係陣痛啊。其實好似M同感,啲痛感係一陣一陣,一浪一浪咁樣嘅。痛起上嚟嘅時候好痛好痛,因為子宮收縮。但同左一排,下腹又會好似放鬆啲,冇咁痛。然後我有感受到下體有嘢流出來啦,突然我醒起上次喺醫院護士都有比止痛藥我食,即刻問老公拍左兩粒之後,隔咗一陣就冇咁痛啦,慢慢個人都開始可以入睡啦。

我諗,呢個就係我嘅小產過程啦。

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