Joy to the world!

Other than the Lord is come, my sunshine is due this month and viola~~~here she comes!

She doesn’t have Chinese name yet we called her Luna by now.

The way she came was a very special experience to me as I have never imagined what would I feel at that moment. 

Compared to my first boy, he was silent all the way from my tummy to the day Me and husband first saw him at ICU. We thought he was quiet and we were happy about it.

 Things totally changed when he got home as he cried a lot more than at hospital. He seemed hardly fell asleep in first few months. Since he was my first baby, I was absolutely clueless of how a baby would behave and understand what they may suggest by simply hearing the crying…😒

 It was also me first time got into breastfeeding. Oh dear! That was another long story to talk about. 

All I can say now is me and husband were completely drained by confusions, anxieties and tiredness at that time. Both me and husband went mad, nervous and anxious in the first few months. We were exhausted by non-stop feeding, crying, changing diapers, dealing with different and conflicing opinions and suggestions by elders from us. 

OK…5 years gone. The above has already turned into my vivid memory of raising a little baby. 

I am now a little bit more confident in breastfeeding and everything else. So does hubby.

So I rarely imagined what would happen when baby girl come on earth since I have already learnt a bit.

However, the way she came did so such a great impact on me.

 I was so nervous while on the surgery bed since I was so afraid of pain. I was panic and worried about everything in the surgery room, the light, the needles, the beep sound from machines…any sensations which I am not familiar with would drive me crazy. In addition to the anaesthetics, I was dizzy, my heart bounced fiercely and the buzzing in my head, I was so irritated and depressed! I felt so vulnerable on the bed. 

Besides, my surgery suddenly went earlier than the designated time. I could not make a call to hubby to wait for me outside. I was nearly collapsed outside the surgery room. I then asked a surgeon if she could borrow her phone to me to make the phone call. 

I really hated those EE who only cares about themselves and never think about the feelings of patients! 

Ok, back to surgery room, I heard a loud and clear yelling behind the towel blocked my tummy. This was the first cry from my girl. 

All my crazy thoughts just blown away in that instant. I really wanted to see my girl to know what does she look like.

After doctors took her out, nurses took her into another room to do some checking and cleaning. I could hear her cried all along. Tears started coming into my eyes. My heart filled with bliss and joy. I knew everything is coming to an end now. The expectations, my pains, my nervous…are gone and there is nothing more important than my girl.

Here is a new life, another new beginning and new chapter of both my life and her life. 

Nurse held her to me and put her on my breasts. It was a wonderful experience. While doctors were busy at clipping and stitching of my tummy, my girl lied on my chest and worked so hard to move around. She has made some noises while moving around. She was so different from her big brother. This was my first thought. I felt so blessed. I have forgotten the fear and pain. All I could think of is my girl. 

Maybe 5 or 10 minutes later, nurses took her away again from me to do further checking. My surgery was almost came to end. 


Brand new day

Tomorrow is gonna be a brand new day.

For baby sis is on her way…

She will be greeted by lots of joyful hearts and welcoming hands,

No longer in my tummy, leave my body,

37 weeks of “hiding” is coming to an end.

2 more days to go…

I am nervous…

I am getting more nervous…

My heartbeat starts to bounce fiercely when I imagining myself admitting into hospital.

My feet started to cramp…


I started to feel helpless,

A little bit of fear…

Of death?

Or pain maybe?

Or that kind of uncertainty…?

I don’t feel like I am going to labour, 

But have to be prepared myself for surgery and the recovery.

My focus has been stuck on these.

I don’t have much excitement of my little girl is about coming on earth.

But loathed with the fear of pain, uncomfortableness and all of the inconvenience of lying on bed.

I am unable to do a thing because of the wound. 

I feel helpless lying on bed.

Okay, I see the wound more than my baby…I get it.

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